


sunflowers

by pastel_gremlin



Category: The School for Good and Evil - Soman Chainani
Genre: Angst, F/F, hanahaki, hestadil, hester has hanahaki, justice for mona
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:08:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,685
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24752131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pastel_gremlin/pseuds/pastel_gremlin
Summary: hester has hanahaki because anadil doesn't love her back.some angst and blood
Relationships: Anadil/Hester (The School for Good and Evil)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 23





	sunflowers

**Author's Note:**

> google hanahaki if you don't know what it is smh

**Hester's POV**

_Every day with these goddamn flowers_ , I thought, coughing petals into the toilet. 

My throat burned and my chest ached. I don't think coughing up flowers is good for your lungs. 

I leaned against the wall of the small bathroom, my breath rasping. 

_Eleven days,_ I thought, resting my head in my hands. _Eleven days since the first petal._ I sighed and stood up, running a hand through my black and red hair. 

I've been coughing up sunflower petals for a week and a half. At first I didn't know what it was, but then I took a few solo trips to the library, and finally found an old book on Hanahaki. 

I never knew Anadil loved sunflowers. 

* * * * *

"Ani, I can't come study with you today," I sighed, avoided the albino's crimson eyes. 

"Why not? It's not like either of us have anything better to do," Anadil said, her tone monotonous but her eyes disappointed.

Anxiety seized my chest. I hadn't thought of an excuse. I can't be around her anymore, because the more I see her, the worse the Hanahaki gets. 

"Um- I'm. . . I'm going to Mona's dorm, I've got a question for her," I stammered, desperately improvising. 

Anadil narrowed her eyes. "I thought you hated Mona."

_Shit, I do. Ani won't believe that excuse._

"D-did I say Mona? I meant Arachne. Actually, I better head over there now," I stood up and opened the door. 

"You hate Arachne, too," Anadil said softly from behind me. 

I pretended I didn't hear her and left the room.

* * * * *

I hid in the back of the library, in a remote corner that Ani and I found one day. I knew she wouldn't look for me here. 

_It's hopeless. If she doesn't fall in love with me, these flowers will kill me._

Imagine what a stupid death that would be for a Never. Death by flowers. I don't want that on my tombstone. 

_Hester of Ravenswood, killed by sunflowers because she fell in love._

Fucking pathetic.

"Hester!" a raspy voice called. 

_Oh shit, Anadil came to look for me._ I held my breath and pressed my back against the cracked bricks, trying to melt into the shadows. _Please don't find me please don't find me please don't fi-_

"Hester, what the hell are you doing back here? I thought you said you were going to Arachne's room," Anadil said as she walked around a bookshelf and saw me. 

"Ah- um, yeah I just- I had to-"

Anadil put a hand on my arm. "Shut up. Don't bother. You've been avoiding me lately and I want to know why. First you started randomly running out of the room and not coming back for a while. Then you started refusing to even be near me. And now you say you can't study with me because you're going to Arachne's dorm - someone you hate - and instead, I find you hiding in the back of the library. What the fuck is going on, Hester?"

I froze, unable to take my focus off her hand that was still laying on my arm. I opened my mouth to answer, but a cough rose in my chest. I pulled my arm away from her and doubled over, coughing violently. 

"Hester, are you okay?" Anadil asked, alarmed. I nodded, still coughing. 

"You don't sound okay, are you sick? Maybe we should-" I cut her off by pushing her aside and running out of the library to the nearest bathroom. I slammed the bathroom door open, thankful that nobody was inside, and collapsed over the toilet. 

As I coughed, spitting petals, blood dripped from my mouth and onto the toilet seat. The spot of red on a background of white looked like Anadil's eyes against her skin. 

My chest felt like it was on fire; I could barely breathe. After what seemed like forever, I coughed up the last of the flowers and sat back, exhausted. I stood up slowly, wiping the blood off my lips. I flushed the toilet, watching petals and blood swirl down. 

I glanced in the cracked mirror before I walked out, making sure all the blood was cleaned off my face. 

I opened the bathroom door and walked back to Room 66, sitting down on my bed nonchalantly. 

Anadil wasn't in the room, and Dot didn't even give me a second look. 

* * * * *

It's been three days since Anadil found me in the back of the library. I've barely seen her since then, and neither of us have mentioned the incident.

And the Hanahaki's getting worse. 

The coughing fits happen at least once an hour, even at night. Sunflower after sunflower after sunflower. 

_I hate flowers._

"Hester," Anadil said, walking into the room and sitting on her bed across from me. "You've been avoiding me even more. Tell me what's going on." Her red eyes met mine. She looked angry, but underneath the anger I saw something else. Something more. . . sad. 

I shook my head, unable to hold her gaze. "Anadil, please. . . It's nothing."

"Not Ani anymore, huh?" she deadpanned, with an undertone of anger. I looked down, feeling the beginnings of a cough rising in my throat. 

"I- I have to go, I'll be right back-" I said, standing up quickly. Anadil gripped my shoulder and pushed me back onto the bed. 

"No," she said firmly. "You're staying here until you tell me whats going on."

I started to panic and tried to break away, but she grabbed my wrist tightly. The contact made the flowers worse, I could barely breathe. Usually I'd be strong enough to free my wrist, but my energy was focusing on wrestling back the cough, and the lack of breath from the petals blocking my airway depleted my strength. Not to mention, Anadil's way stronger than she looks.

The world started spinning around me, the edges of my vision getting blurry. My chest felt like it was about to explode from lack of air. I opened my mouth to tell her to let me go, that had to leave-

But words didn't come out like they were supposed to. Instead, sunflower petals poured out, unable to be kept back anymore. I coughed, my ribs aching, trying to hold the petals in my mouth with my free hand. They slipped between my fingers and blood dripped from my lips. Anadil released my wrist in shock, staring at the flowers that fell into my lap. 

I darted around her and ran out of the room, choking on blood. I couldn't tell if the tears streaming down my face were from coughing or from the sadness filling my heart.

_She knows._

_And since she knows about almost every magical illness there is, there's no doubt she knows about Hanahaki._

_And she knows her favorite flower is a sunflower._

_Now she knows I love her._

I collapsed on the floor of the nearest bathroom, kneeling on the cracked and dirty tiles. I was too weak to make it to the toilet. 

I gasped for breath in between coughs, blood staining the floor around me. Countless sunflower petals stuck to my clothes and fell to the ground. 

Anadil suddenly burst into the bathroom, immediately dropping to her knees beside me. I tried to speak, to tell her to leave, but I was coughing too hard to form words. I shoved her away weakly, but she barely budged. 

"Hester, you aren't gonna shut me out. You can't get rid of me; you should know this by now."

She continued kneeling beside me, rubbing circles on my back as I spat the last of the petals out of my mouth. Anadil waited while I caught my breath, my chest aching. 

She put her hand under my chin and lifted my head, forcing me to meet her piercing red eyes.

"It's Hanahaki, isn't it," she said.

It wasn't a question.

I squeezed my eyes shut and nodded. 

"Hester," she whispered. "Hey. Look at me." I opened my eyes tentatively, feeling a tear slip down my cheek. She gently brushed it away with her thumb, cupping my cheek. A surge of anger shot through me.

_Why the hell am I showing weakness? I can't. I shouldn't. Nevers aren't weak._

But even so, I found myself leaning into her hand. 

"Take a deep breath," Anadil said, taking her hand away. I was saddened by the loss of contact and confused by her command, but I breathed deeply-

_Holy shit._

_I can breathe._

_The flowers are gone._

I laughed softly, savoring the deep breaths I hadn't been able to take in over a month. Before Hanahaki, I hadn't realized what a wonderful gift breathing is. For a moment, I didn't fully register the fact that my Hanahaki was gone.

It was _gone._

There's only two ways to get rid of Hanahaki.

Either the flowers are surgically removed, or-

I turned to Anadil in shock.

_Or the one you love falls in love with you._

Anadil saw the realization dawning on me, and a sad smile spread across her face.

"I loved you the whole time. But I couldn't admit it. I told myself I didn't. I told myself I was your henchman, nothing more. That we could never be anything more. But I was lying to myself." She shook her head. "Now I know. Now I realize." She gently wiped blood off my lips. "Now I know the truth."

I leaned in suddenly and kissed her before she could kiss me first. 

I wrapped my fingers in her silvery white hair like it was a lifeline, her hands tracing my spine. She pulled away slightly, her paper-white skin flushed pink. 

"I love you, Ani," I whispered, seeing the love in her red eyes and knowing it was mirrored in my own.

"I love you too," she responded, intertwining our fingers. As we leaned in to kiss again, someone banged on the bathroom door. 

"Hurry the hell up!" Mona yelled from the other side.

"Fuck off, Mona!" I yelled back, pressing my lips against Anadil's again.

We didn't come out of that bathroom for a long time.


End file.
